Passive-Aggressive Behavior

My son 'Izzy' & I. 

By Izzy Israel Wignall
   My son recently just wrote this status on his facebook and I had to share this. I agree with him 100 percent and I think that the art of confronting issues is often a lost art. 

"Passive-aggressive behavior: I feel like so many peeps my age struggle with it (I know I used to heavily and it's something I am growing in as a leader).

What is passive-aggressive behavior? It's essentially a fear of conflict. You act nice with people even though you have a problem with them. You tease someone because, instead of settling a dispute with them, you want to let your frustration out through tearing them down. You stir up gossip instead of talking to the person. You quit things because you don't want to own up to your mistakes and settle conflict with leadership.

I'm speaking here as a leader of many different people (Worship Director at a church, R.A. at Greenville College, Studio Manager for the Audio Department, Worship Leader of a Chapel Band). I can tell you that passive-aggressive behavior ruins relationships and can break-apart groups of people. I think because my generation is very anti-social because of technology and Facebook/the internet/media and entertainment dominating our lives, being passive-aggressive is more natural than people in previous generations. Just like deleting someone on Facebook is easy, not dealing with conflict and deleting "people" in real life is easy.

Just because we have different struggles because of our culture isn't an excuse, to be passive-aggressive. If you have a problem with someone, kindly let them know--don't "tease" them or jokingly make fun of them as a way of letting your frustration out. If someone wants to settle a disagreement with you, do it and don't chicken-out. And don't start drama and spread gossip instead of confronting the issue at hand. These behaviors never solve anything and do nothing but hurt you as an individual. As a leader, I'm so annoyed by things like this.

So, if you want to be a leader, or hold a stable job for a long period of time (instead of quitting because you're frustrated and you didn't voice your frustrations with your boss), or get married and have a healthy, servant-like relationship with your spouse, then really tackle and kill passive-aggressive behavior now."

#mythoughtstoday" - Izzy Israel Wignall